Ryan Adams song "Note to self: Don't Die" has some wonderful lyrics to live by. What resonates with me is "Don't change for anyone. just lie."
Is that my 'great expectation'? Is what I give the people in my life a feeling of something great when there is really no substance at all? I feel that statement is true. This is a weird topic without being very egocentric. Its not that I feel that I am better. its just that my purpose in life has been to resolve conflict and comfort. I am a joy. A shoulder, calming voice, a distraction, a thrill seeker, a clown, a comedian, an entertainer, a politician, a lover, a toy. And what do i want in return? comfort stability and little mess. which is sad. I am a vile person. a sycophant to myself. So the effort to be my friend will not come from me, it will be your effort. its sad, but true.
I showed my therapist a painting of me and my mother. She said that i don't get my comfort from that women, i get it from items i surround myself with. I don't get it from her i get it from things. which translates to intimacy. which reasons why i am doing a huge art project on intimacy. i simply don't understand. Art advice: create what you fear and it will have emotion.
Woody Allen gave the name to my painting, by one of his quotes. He stated on the matter of problems in our lives. "if its not one thing, its your mother." oh happy mothers day. I love you mom
No, I mean it. (don't change just lie.)
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Monday, May 4, 2009
Notecard of life...for parents
There is a growing plague among the minds of parents- the endless picture taking of your children. Its annoying. Cut that shit out. If you do insist on taking all those pictures, my best creative and style advice- hire a photo editor. Your child needs 5 good photos of themselves- at any given age. Anything over that is an ego trip and clearly very self indulgent.
I would love to list the reason why one should use restraint.
1. 5 good photos can say more about you and your kid than all the flipping pictures you take of them. If edited well, those limited photos will serve every purpose. Cover of holiday cards, keepsake, identification for police, and determining of future potential apprehension of realistic expectations.
its annoying to be constantly assaulted by the 'new' photos of your children that are posted on every single social networking website. Everyday I am hit with new updated photos of children doing absolutely nothing. Frankly it only shows me a measure of your life. That you have put aside your dreams an ambitions as a person and dedicated your life to documenting the every action and insignificant life of your child.
2. Children are not a stand in for actual active in ones life. Stop taking the pictures and the videos. You are the only one that truly thinks they are adorable. They are not. If anyone else thinks your kids are amazing and adorable- then that person is creepy. (grandparents are the exception) I will never befriend any person (whom I know very well or very little) if their child's photo is a stand in for their own profile picture. Don't pimp your child to hide yourself behind. Its an ego trip and you know it. stop it. Put your face out there. Dateline to catch a predator should be knocking at your door. It wrong behavior. And you are putting your child out there in society which makes them more vulnerable to harm.
3. Children love limits and respect rules. Every child psychologist will tell you to set up rules and live by them. Its the only healthy way to raise your child.
4. I don't and will never like your child as much as you do. I simply do not need to see your child that much. If you're going to take the pictures, then fine, keep them private. I don't need to see them. 5 pictures is all i need to see of your child.
5. your child is not going to want all those pictures when they grow up. One fails when one is learning. You remember those failures and grow from them. Those memorises what change a person. You do not need a visual proof of your failures, no matter how gallant the effort and try.
The memory of the event is enough to model the person. Don't document it. Your child will resent you for it.
Do the world a favor retrain yourself or edit yourself. Its my best advice and a note card to live by.
I would love to list the reason why one should use restraint.
1. 5 good photos can say more about you and your kid than all the flipping pictures you take of them. If edited well, those limited photos will serve every purpose. Cover of holiday cards, keepsake, identification for police, and determining of future potential apprehension of realistic expectations.
its annoying to be constantly assaulted by the 'new' photos of your children that are posted on every single social networking website. Everyday I am hit with new updated photos of children doing absolutely nothing. Frankly it only shows me a measure of your life. That you have put aside your dreams an ambitions as a person and dedicated your life to documenting the every action and insignificant life of your child.
2. Children are not a stand in for actual active in ones life. Stop taking the pictures and the videos. You are the only one that truly thinks they are adorable. They are not. If anyone else thinks your kids are amazing and adorable- then that person is creepy. (grandparents are the exception) I will never befriend any person (whom I know very well or very little) if their child's photo is a stand in for their own profile picture. Don't pimp your child to hide yourself behind. Its an ego trip and you know it. stop it. Put your face out there. Dateline to catch a predator should be knocking at your door. It wrong behavior. And you are putting your child out there in society which makes them more vulnerable to harm.
3. Children love limits and respect rules. Every child psychologist will tell you to set up rules and live by them. Its the only healthy way to raise your child.
4. I don't and will never like your child as much as you do. I simply do not need to see your child that much. If you're going to take the pictures, then fine, keep them private. I don't need to see them. 5 pictures is all i need to see of your child.
5. your child is not going to want all those pictures when they grow up. One fails when one is learning. You remember those failures and grow from them. Those memorises what change a person. You do not need a visual proof of your failures, no matter how gallant the effort and try.
The memory of the event is enough to model the person. Don't document it. Your child will resent you for it.
Do the world a favor retrain yourself or edit yourself. Its my best advice and a note card to live by.
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